Lessons Learned & What Keeps Me Going

daretojump_bmlDo you know what I have truly learned from this lawsuit? I have learned that you never know when you might be called to account for all that you have said and done. I realize that I might be in a slightly different situation than most because my words are written and permanent – and online, which makes them almost immortal. But everyone will be called to account to the Lord someday. And he doesn’t forget any of our words! My accounting is just coming a little early. And I regret a lot of my words! I don’t regret my positions, however, just my choice of words sometimes. 

When I think that lots of people will flock to my blog after this t.v. interview, I wish I had done a better job of representing Christ’s gentleness & love. I regret that I got so irritated at people. I regret that I didn’t understand that the read word is so much harsher than the spoken word where you can see the face and hear the tone. But do you know what I don’t regret?  Speaking in the first place- after all, that is in obedience to Christ’s Great Commission!  It took courage to speak at all- and I know that Christ honors me for that much.  Just wish I had done better.  And I will do so in the future- I will learn from this mistake.Great_Commission

Do I think that this would have helped my case at all? No, not at all. My opinion is what
matters to the liberals. The most gentle of women who wouldn’t bake a cake for a gay wedding was sued (and lost everything) by a violent gay lobby group. Ditto for the sweetest florist in the world. People don’t care how sweetly you state your anti-gay agenda opinion. It, in and of itself, is enough to warrant your complete and total destruction. And they don’t look back with regret- they consider your destruction to be a valiant win. So, my regret isn’t for self protection. No. 
It is simply that I will be seen as a Christian when all is said and done. And people will be coming to see what THIS Christian is all about. I believe in straight talk. I believe in taking the tough stance. I believe in honesty.2timothy1-7 I believe in courage and standing for Christ boldly. But I lost my temper one time too many and wish I didn’t. I was curt one time to many and wish I hadn’t been. I bit more than I should have. My junk yard dog lacked sufficient discipline; my work is unworthy of Christ. That is what I regret. I feel naked, as if I am already standing before Jesus in my day of judgement. On the positive side, it greatly inspires me to do better from this day forward.
Please don’t be the person out there that nods their head and says, “I always told her that,” or, “I always knew she would regret that,” or, “I would never have been like her.” Instead, forgive my imperfections and learn from them. Indeed, start your own blog instead of judging me.  Begin your own work for Christ- speak the Word, imperfect as your words will be.  Life is about learning.  We will always stumble.
My advice to everyone is this: your day of judgement will come just like mine. The public eye can’t even see as clearly as the Lord’s eye. If I am being laid open for all to see now, just think how naked you will stand before Jesus some day! God put me here for a reason, Friends, and that is to instruct you. To make an example for you. When I began this site, it was to BE a regular woman, imperfect in every way, who simply had the audacity to BEGIN the work of the Great Commission. I wanted to encourage every person by proving that God can use every one of us to 10700135484_05889e7943_bdo his work. He promised that he can and will use every pot, cracks and all, to do great things on this earth. Jesus told us to OPEN OUR MOUTHS AND SPEAK. If we don’t speak, nothing can happen.
And so, I spoke. And you can all see the results. Much has happened over the past six years. We have gone up and down and all around. God has been all through my and your lives. He has done miracles, like healing Cal’s cancer and healing my depression. He has given great trials which we have all overcome. We have all gained strength through binding with one another and through frank discussion and mutual prayer. So many of you have become great mutual friends through my site. We have become bold in the face of political adversity. And now, I face the biggest trial of my life. Will I or will I not stand up for Christ as the world turns to look at me? Who will publicly stand with me, and thus, for Christ and what he taught us? Who will scurry away in fright? Who will be afraid to be seen with me? All this will be seen.  And God will see it too.
Can you see how God is using a Nobody? He can achieve great things through everyone. Even you.bbfd460ad3f323191ee433570630afb7
I am standing tall for you, readers. Sometimes, I want to just give up. I’ll be honest. I want to just say, “no more.” Sometimes, I want to just leave this earth and go home to Jesus. Such is the burden upon me now. I feel as if happiness will never come to me again. But then, I think of you. I’m serious. What would you do if you heard I gave up- if I took a bottle of pills and just went to sleep? Before God even gives his judgement in this case? What if I give up after all I have told you? Won’t you lose hope too? Might you also give up? If so, why have I worked for so long? I can’t let you down! You and my children are all that tether me to this world right now. This is the God’s honest truth. I will stay to the end and endure what God has set before me. I want you to see what courage is. I want you to know that God does not test beyond what is bearable. I want you to do likewise.
God is doing a mighty work through me. I don’t know why. I don’t know where he is going. I have no idea if he will save me. I just know I have to take each step in faith. And you are all meant to witness each step. It is for all your edification. You were meant to watch. There are no coincidences in life. I am nobody in this world and yet, this very important case swirls about me. I wish it wouldn’t. I wish it were swirling around someone else and I got to cheer them on.  I just want peace and quiet despite the image my enemies want to portray. But God will do what he will do. You must also obey God in what he asks of you. Just as I am. No one gets to hand in the towel, hear?  No one.  We’re in this together, thick and thin.2_timothy_4_7_by_kawaii_ariana-d5htwij

8 comments

  1. Outstanding! Really. There’s nothing more to say.

    Never give up. You’re doing a great service to all, even if they neither know nor appreciate it.

  2. Shalom from a TALL fellow rebel! 😊 For two days I have been meaning to write you and thank you for your courage to stand tall, firm and speak your faith and the truth. You have encouraged and inspired me! I was planning to write you today, but after reading your latest entry I realized I needed to do it now. I want to thank you for a number of reasons. First, I too am a warrior from a lifetime of battles, who hasn’t yet learned how to lay down my warrior and fight the good fight with gentleness and love. I am still fighting flesh and blood, forgetting where the real battle is. I have deeply wounded and brought destruction with words I wote, which were intended for healing and reconciliation; I neglected to reflect Yeshua’s love in defending myself & “truth”. When I started reading your blog in July I could relate to your suffering, your strength, and your story has helped to increase my faith in God’s salvation and victory over me. I gained the courage to keep fighting the good fight. Your testimony about how you were protected from your ex-boyfriend’s family after you prayed and gave yourself to God reminded me that my victory in Messiah will be won the same way: through prayer & trust in God rather than man. Thank-you! Finally, I have been aching to write for years and many have encouraged me to write my story in a novel but I felt overwhelmed at the thought of rehashing my whole life this way. I have considered blogging but felt overwhelmed at the prospect of the pressures of advertising and writing frequently. After I read your entry entitled, “Overcoming Terrible Adversity”, it dawned on me that I could blog through WordPress freely! I began to pray about it but fear & lies from the devil got in the way. I gave up on it. It wouldn’t leave me alone, though, and I was writing blog entry after entry in my head. Through spiritual warfare yesterday I came to see the devil’s lies and tactics that were keeping me from my inspiration. I have praises to shout and victories to share, hoping to encourage others and exalt God’s power, beauty and holiness throughout the Earth. I want to set my voice free in a way that brings life to myself and others; use the power of words for good. So, I am grateful to you, for you have inspired me to start my own blog dedicated to God!😊 Praise God and don’t give up! I am just getting my blog set up, but please check it out when it’s ready at: freedomintheweeds@wordpress.com. Would you permit me to share your blogspot as my inspiration? Also, if you have any blogging wisdom/advice to share, I would be grateful for it. Shalom, Lyndsay

    • Thank you so much. You have no idea how much your words mean to me. I am at a time where my life’s work is being questioned, not only by outsiders, but by insiders- even by myself. Those who say such things to me are sent by My Father who wants to encourage me so that I won’t give up. So, if I have inspired and helped you, the favor is returned by your comment here! You cheer my heart greatly! smiles!

      I do have advice for you. Please send me a friend request at https://www.facebook.com/shortlittlerebel on Facebook. If you don’t have a Facebook account, you will need one. I will explain later. I will use private messaging to help you link up your new blog in such a way to get the most out of search engines so that your new blog will rise quickly in internet searches. Also, if you intend to ever write about homosexuality, you may receive the attention of violent lefties whose sole mission is to take new blogs down. (I am not exaggerating. They exist with this mission and literally bring the addresses of new blogs and pages and say, “Ok, here is one that is rising. Let’s all go and attack it.”) They hope to make the author believe that there are many who hate them when it is only about 300. It is very psychologically effective. So you will need my word blocker list. I will give that to you so that you will never even see their comment- neither will your readers. They will automatically be sent to the trash. I will teach you, as I have taught many, how to launch and keep a blog up for good and how to grow your audience month by month, year by year.

      I have a project called, Project Redemption, whose sole goal is to link up fellow bloggers so that if my page is ever taken down by Facebook, there will be a group of bloggers secretly connected that I can reconnect to. Please join that group. You will make instant friends with many Christian bloggers and can link to their blogs. This also helps your blog grow. There are many other things I can give to you to help you. This is one of my missions: to help and instruct others to begin walking out the Great Commission via blogging.

      If we wait until we are perfect before we speak, then we will never speak. We just need to be prepared to suffer for Christ as I am now suffering. Every word will be held against us. But we MUST trust in God, as I am, to come to our rescue when we are dragged before the court. I am being dragged before the court now. I must trust in God because he is all I have. I am not rich; I am not powerful; I am not famous. I could lose and have the world call me a liar. This could be my fate and I hate the thought. But I must believe that God has his purpose. How many times have I preached this message to others? Now, God is asking me to live out my faith in public for all to see. You may be asked this same thing from God should you begin. But God is not interested in our comfort. He is interested in using his servants to glorify his name. Are you that brave, my friend? Know the cost before you begin. Then, set your whole mind, body and soul to the task- there is great reward for those who love God. Both here on earth and in heaven. For heaven is in our midst. I hope I see your friend request. Tell me your name here on WordPress. If you want it to be confidential, just say so in your next comment. I monitor every comment before it is published. I won’t print it, but I will know you when you send the friend request.

      • Can you try to resent it? Is your account brand new? I didn’t see this message and I might have marked it as spam. I get so many friend requests that are spam. I know they are spam because they are brand new. I don’t know how to fix this problem. Try to resend it. I will try to figure out a way to ‘unspam’ an account on my side! eegads!

  3. I commend you for doing all that you have done, and giving Christ all the credit for your good work. I can understand what you mean about looking back and regretting how you might have said things, I know I have felt that way before too! Maybe not as much online, but in person. None of us are perfect, but at least you are doing all you can to glorify God, and that , in the end, is what I hope people will see. Praying for you!

    • Thank you, Lisa. I was fretting about this matter and then, I felt the calming voice of the Holy Spirit speak to me. ‘Just admit online that you wished you could have spoken more kindly.” And I felt jubilant! Such an easy thing to do! Prayer really works. The Lord really is with us. I had been feeling so blue about it. I felt I had let Jesus down, like I had done a bad job. Then, I knew that if I just admitted how I felt, people would forgive me and understand! And that it was even better than if I had done a perfect job in the first place! hallelujah? lol. Who doesn’t know what it is like to lose their temper and be a jerk? Who can’t understand Apostle Paul when he said, “I am the worst of all!” I felt so much better after writing this article. I’m glad you can understand me. lol. After I wrote this article, even I forgave myself! lololol. truly. We are not to sit around condemning ourselves after Jesus has forgiven us. He sees our hearts and knows our motives. He knows our failures and shortcomings. And I know he would rather we begin his work than remain silent- even if, no WHEN, we are imperfect and stupid going about it. Many blessings, Lisa.

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